Growing old sucks. This isn’t just the blatantly obvious ramblings of an aging nerd realizing he’s just a few short years away from graduating from being “young” to being “middle-aged.” You notice many things about yourself and the world around you. You step on the scale and realize that you no longer suffer from that being underweight problem. Nothing works the way it used to; your joints start to creak every now and again, you start taking multivitamins to keep up your energy, and you start getting up in the middle of the night to take a piss. Sure, I complain, but I’m still a “young” man. I’m not giving up on youth completely until Ensure becomes a regular part of my diet.
It’s not just the physical things, either; You start to dread your own birthday, most of your favorite music is considered “the classics,” and when you’re in public, people stare at you because you jumped off the fashion train when the Miami Vice look was still en vogue. You start to feel out of place, like you’re part of a bygone era; or perhaps part of a Dr. Who prank in which you were drugged and dragged into a TARDIS and the “random” button was hit, and now you’re marooned in a different time. Even your hobbies have “evolved” (and I use the term loosely) with the times, leaving you to be that cantankerous old geezer with a shotgun sitting in his rocking chair on the porch yelling at the young’uns to “get the hell off his lawn.”