Category Archives: Movies

Why Star Wars: The Force Awakens Will Suck

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There, now that I have your attention let me explain.  I personally plan on watching the new Star Wars film and will most likely enjoy it.  I have just grown a little bit sick of all the hype and all the marketing and I am especially tired of all the people who saw the trailer and said it was so good it made them cry.  I do not hate Star Wars or J.J. Abrams and the new movie will probably be very good.  This is just a list poking a little bit of fun at all of the extreme excitement for the new film.  What follows is entirely based off of what has been seen in the multiple trailers that have been released and I have not read any of the books leading up to the movie.

Please take this list as it was intended, all in good fun.

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Ghostbusters, Reboot Hell: Choose and Perish

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I can’t keep my mouth shut anymore. Screw the Ghostbusters reboot! Here come the cries of “Sexism!!!” My issue with this film is not the all female cast. It is with the fact that they are doing it as a reboot. They very easily could have just described this as a branch of the previously established Ghostbusters franchise that happened to be run by a group of women and I would not be aggravated. This does not mean that these women could not be scientists or be coming up with their own fantastic technological advances to make the business better and would have placed them in the same universe as the Ghostbusters fans already know and love.

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One Last Review… For the Hobbit

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I know that I have not posted anything in a long while but I feel that the time for me to make my opinions known has come once again.

It is finished. The great odyssey has been completed. Our journeys now have ended. The final trip to Peter Jackson’s vision of Middle Earth has taken place. The question remains, how was it?

“The Hobbit: Battle of the Five Armies” in my opinion has been the best of the three Hobbit films. Sir Peter Jackson rediscovered some of the magic he had while filming “The Lord of the Rings”. Does this mean that this film is perfect? Heavens no, this film has some rather massive flaws but they do not achieve the level of silliness that I witnessed while watching “The Desolation of Smaug”.

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See you on the other side…

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I’m kicking down the 4th wall for right now…

Today, I lost one of my childhood heroes. One of the four men who shaped my interests and hobbies, predating even when I was given my first Dungeons & Dragons Basic Set, has passed away at the age of 69.

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Harold Ramis was both co-star and co-writer of my very first love, Ghostbusters. While his career as a writer, director, and comedian does not begin and end with Ghostbusters, it will certainly be what he was best remembered for. He went on to an incredible career, directing Analyze This, Caddyshack, National Lampoon’s Vacation, and Groundhog Day. His writing credits also include Animal House and Meatballs. Of course, we all remember his role in Stripes, as well. Read the rest of this entry

The Desolation of Plot

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Before I get started on this I offer the warning that there are several spoilers included.

Great Tolkien’s ghost!  What did I just watch?

First of all I would like to say that I had high hopes for this film after being slightly disappointed by the first Hobbit movie.  I enjoyed it but as a fan of the novel I felt that it was lacking something.  The Desolation of Smaug just blew my mind on how absurd a film based around a beloved franchise can get.

I can overlook some of the ridiculous humor and I am more than happy to accept that they added things to the story in order to explain what Gandalf was doing while separate from the party. but sheesh, enough is enough. Read the rest of this entry

An Unexpected Journey… Or was it?

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I am quite certain that my colleague Doctor Belmont will be posting his opinions on this film as well.  In fact I am quite surprised that I actually beat him to it.  Now on to my thoughts.

This film had problems, lots of them.  Where should I even begin?  Ah yes, the Tolkien lore.  I know that many fans of the Hobbit and Lord of the Rings novels will be going to see these films and for those fans who are obsessive about the lore I think that there will be some disappointment.  The most blatant change that lovers of the books will notice is that Azog, a goblin chieftain, is placed as the major villain for this installment.  That’s right folks, a goblin who is dead in the novels is alive and well and is chasing our party of hapless dwarves.  This leads to some dramatic alterations of several scenes that we are familiar with in the novel including the trip to Rivendell and the treetop escape.

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Watch out! The Sky is Falling

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To anyone who actually read my last post I must apologize.  I meant to write more often but I found myself distracted by post season baseball and the current elections…  and no I am not telling you who I voted for simply because this is a blog about nerd culture and no matter who I said it would probably start an argument somewhere.

So onto a lighter note although I have failed to keep up with my promise to review the Dresden Files novels, which I plan on remedying, I have something else I wish to elaborate upon.  “Skyfall” the new James Bond film.

Yes, some of you are probably asking, “What in the world does this have to do with the geek subculture?”  Well as far as I am concerned, granted I am a James Bond fan, these films have always had a hint of the fantastical and a certain amount of science fiction involved in their gadgets.  I feel that I can also get away with this because of the literary origins of the James Bond franchise.  I tip my pointy hat to the late, great Ian Fleming.
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The Gamers

My first review, and it’s a text review. Let’s start this site on a positive note, shall we?

I’ve never been a guy who’s big on indie movies; I always have those visions of snobbish self-important wastrels wearing little black berets and sunglasses, sipping on their highly-caffeinated drinks with obscenely silly Italian names (Yeah, great “positive start,” Belmont…), but I digress.

Enter The Gamers. I discovered this little indie gem through a friend of mine from a local community college; he’s a professor there, who at the time was running the “Do or Dice” gaming club. The reason that this indie film was able to capture my attention is because the subject was right up my alley—gaming! I decided to give this indie flick a try, and I wasn’t disappointed.

The Gamers uses a new spin on the rather tired “stranger in a strange land” genre, and turns it on its ear. We’re all sick of seeing “A [insert American stereotype] in King Arthur’s Court,” or its nigh-endless supply of spin-offs and remakes vomited up by the vacuous void of uncreativity and corporate red-light district that is Hollywood. Instead of a story about gamers themselves being thrust into a fantasy world where their adventures are real, we get treated to dual-natured movie in which we’re really watching two separate films. In one hand, you have a group of gamers playing an intense and rousing game of the little-known “Generic: The Fantasy” with their books wrapped with “+2 Brown-bag book covers of lawsuit protection.” On the other hand, you have the CHARACTERS of these dice-slinging dorks on the very adventure that the players are running.

The movie’s opening treats us to the main characters posed on sepia-toned character sheets, complete with twinked character stats (a 19 Intelligence or Strength? Shenanigans!). We have Newmoon the elven ranger, Nimble the thief, Rogar the Barbarian (who is unusually well-spoken for someone who’s just shy of riding the short bus to Barbarian school), Mark the Red, and Ambrose the Ruefully Temporary…magician by hobby. (more…)